Halloween or Hey, Look At Him, He's A Dog

Dear Stella,

Today was Halloween and you were a floppy eared bunny. You looked so incredibly adorable in your costume. It was a little disheartening how many people thought you were both a boy and a dog but then I realized you didn't know whether you were a dog or a bunny either so what difference did it make. You just loved the attention and all the people and excitement in Riverside Park.

When your costume first came in the mail, I was very dissapointed. It looked so different from how it appeared in the internet pictures. And it seemed huge, no way would it fit your little 14 month old body. Embarrassingly, I had actually ordered it twice because I was paranoid that it wasn't going to arrive in time from the first place. When I saw it live, I immediately went back to the internet to find out how to send it back and learned that one of the places I ordered from had a Halloween no-return policy. Blood boiling, I wrote an uncharacteristicly hostile email saying how upset I was, how different the costume was in life from the picture, how ridiculous that it claimed to fit 12-18 months and how wrong it was to have a poorly advertised no-return policy. I got a very nice response back stating that they would waive the policy and take it back after all. I was quite relieved. You'd think, given my reaction, that this was a super expensive item. Don't ask me why it mobilized me as it did. It must be that I know I only get 1 or 2 more Halloweens before you are picking your own costume and I want to make the most of them. In any event, I did decide to try the bunny costume on you before returning it. Lo and behold I discovered that it was not only a perfect fit but also unbelievably adorable. Oops. Sorry wondercostumes.com but thanks for the great customer service.














You were a big hit in the park. There was a bagpiper who led the parade to Hippo Playground and then played a little concert which, of course, you loved. There were tons of people (which you also loved) and we fortunately had Grandma H. with us. I definitely inherited my passion for all things holiday from our beloved family matriarch. Wait, I guess technically Grandma Roz is the family matriarch. Nevertheless, nobody loves holidays more than my mom except maybe your mom. In any event, this marks the beginning of the season and we've got lots more celebrating to do.

Today was such fun. We had a great time.

To Stella, Fourteen Months Old

Dear Stella,

This was a huge month. The biggest thing among many that happened is that you, me and Daddy moved from our apartment in Murray Hill to the Upper West Side. We love it here. It has been so much fun to walk out of our building and in minutes be in the middle of a beautiful park. Now you and I go to the playground in the morning all the time. Where we were before was very commercial with few options for kids. Now we are in Kid-Central with a zillion things to do. Last week we joined the Children's Museum and since then you have gone there everyday. You also have a great room in the new apartment with your own big closet and a place for all of your books, toys and clothes. You seem to really love it.

At the end of September, we had a family birthday party for you at Grandma Helaine and Grandpa Paul's. Lots of people came - all of your grandparents including Great Grandma Roz, Uncle Barry and Aunt Ava, Lee and Rebecca (his new girlfriend), Uncle Fred and Michelle, Steven, Sonya and Clara and Adam (who isn't a blood relative but is familiy all the same). Ranny's daughter Arlene also came with her daughter Arlesha (who is almost exactly the same age as you). We had a great time. Daddy had always been a little skeptical of the whole concept of first birthday parties but even he was won over. It was so much fun and you were really happy all day. I think your favorite part was when everyone sang Happy Birthday to you. You had such a smile on your face as you gazed up at all the cheerful singing crowd. You didn't care that much about your presents but you got some great stuff anyway. Daddy and I decorated the apartment in hot pink and apple green and got a great cake with green and pink polka dots on it. All in all the day was really a fantastic celebration of your first year of life.

You are talking up a storm now. You say tons of words including "car" "banana" "balloon" "cloud" "bottle" and many many others. You do not say "Stella". Daddy and I are trying to help you out with this by going through some of your favorite words with you (you love to repeat them after us) and slipping in Stella where you might not notice. From time to time you kind of get out a "Ta" but most of the time you abandon the whole endeavor when we stump you with a word you can't say. We try very hard to not be annoying parents who chase their kids around asking them to perform tricks. But every once in awhile, it is hard to resist. I can't help but ask for a kiss a few times a day because you puckering your lips and sending one my way is currently my single favorite thing in the entire world. You are also pretty good with animal sounds. You definitely know what a cow, a sheep and a cat say. Most of the time you get dog (ie: when you see a dog on the street you occasionally just start barking "whoo" "whoo" "whoo") and sometimes duck and horse. Remember what I said before about talking? Often you just have time for the first syllable so "elephant" "become "el" and pacifier is "pa" but we understand you all the same.

You are well-versed in the concept of hot. No matter what we serve you at mealtime, you say "hot" "hot" "hot" over and over and sometimes blow on it. You will do this whether the food has just come out of the oven or is straight from the refrigerator. Reading Goodnight Moon now mostly consists of you turning the pages as quickly as possible to point to the fireplace wherever it appears and say "hot" while I attempt to get out as many of the words in the story as I can. You love to read and spend a great deal of time flipping through your books. Sometimes you refuse to eat unless we bring one to the table and let you read while you eat. I know that one day we will need to break you of this habit but, in the meantime, I think hey, whatever works. And I know there are loads of parents out there who let their little ones eat while they watch TV so I think we are doing okay.

This morning we officially began the final step of the weaning process. That means that you are no longer nursing. This marks the end of a beautiful time that I will always treasure having experienced. I know that weaning now is the right thing because you were no longer going back to sleep after I fed you (even when it was around 5am) so I don't think you were really being sated. In fact, I think that breastfeeding had begun to get in the way of your sleeping properly. This morning was also the day that we set the clocks back so you woke up at the ungodly hour of 4am. Daddy got up with you and gave your breakfast. He said you seemed a little miffed, a little confused -- um, why am I eating a big bowl of yogurt right now??? -- but that ultimately you were really okay. When I got up a bit later, you were as happy to see me as ever and didn't make any attempt to pull at my shirt or otherwise get at the boobs. So I guess it is all going to go okay.

I miss those thirty minutes where I got to gaze down at you and rub your head, that time when there was nothing else in the world but you and me. You are pretty fiercely independent already and this marks one of our first separations. I know that my job is to make you independent and I plan to try my best to do that job well. But it sure isn't easy.

You are a kind, beautiful, strong-willed, smart, adorable little girl and I love you more than I can stand.

Love,
Ma
(remember what we said about one syllable words? who has time to say "mama" when there are ladders to climb and drawers to empty?)