To Stella (almost 6 3/4)

In a few short days, days that will pass all too quickly, you will officially be 6 3/4. But, in the past two weeks, you suddenly feel and seem like you are ten. Of course, you are tall for your age but it is more than that. Your face has changed so you look as much like a teenager as you do like a little kid. But it is really in your attitude and demeanor. Although you can revert to toddler in a split second without warning, you generally possess a wisdom and maturity that belies your years. Also this means you sometimes get mad at me, run into your room and slam the door. I'm sitting upstairs at Chelsea Piers right now alternately writing this letter and watching you do gymnastics. This means that after your class you will yell at me for being on my iPod the whole time. But I really am watching you. In fact, it was watching you that inspired me to take this moment to write in here. After completing a floor exercise, you were jumping up and down on some mats and you just looked so happy and energetic and young, like a six year old with this infectious enthusiasm and joy and I wanted to write so that moment would be captured. I hope you never lose your playful, enthusiastic spirit and I relish those moments when you look and seem so carefree and happy. Because you now have more moments of being so self-possessed and mature, I treasure the glimpses of child when I catch them. I love you very much. Love, Mom

First Lost Tooth

Today is a very big day in the life of a six year old. But also a very big day in the life of her mommy.

Stella has been waiting to finally lose her first tooth. She is the very last of all her friends -- from preschool and Trinity -- and it hasn't been easy to wait. Months ago she started telling us that she has a really wiggly tooth. We played along as she showed us but, well, the truth was it wasn't all that wiggly -- or even really wiggly at all. Until about two weeks ago. I predicted at that point that it would fall out around my birthday. But then yesterday, it got super wiggly and kind of a little discolored and we knew that the moment was upon us. David was going to LA for the day today and I had to work so we were kind of hoping that it would hold on for one more day. But in the middle of the afternoon, an email came from Stella's teacher informing us that she lost her tooth and was super distressed because she couldn't find it. It really sucks because she was so hoping for a tooth necklace from the school nurse but she seemed to handle the disappointment well. She did re-visit the cafeteria with one of her friends and looked around on the floor for it. She told me that the first graders were already sitting at the table and she asked them if they'd seen a tooth anywhere but none of them had. She surmised that the lunchroom staff had probably already swept up.

I was really sick this afternoon so I came home early and was in bed for much of the afternoon. From that vantage point, I could hear Stella on the phone telling Daddy and Grandma Helaine and Grandma Roz the whole story. "I am happy that I lost my tooth but sad that I lost my tooth" was a favorite quote. I finally had to drag myself out of bed to see her. She wrote a note to the tooth fairy that said, "I lost my tooth yesterday and I can't find it. Can you come anyway? From Stella" but it wasn't on very nice paper so she did another one after I got up that was really fancy with curly fairy writing and lots of butterflies and flowers. I really hope the tooth fairy will come even though she lost her tooth. And so does she!