2nd Day of Pre-School Quote

Mommy, you know who was there today? No, who? That lady who is like the officer. Ellen? Yeah, Ellen. Why is she like an officer? Because I think she stays in the office. Mostly cute because of adorable inflection. Readers who know Vivian should get it.

Almost a Pre-Schooler

Dear Vivian: I can't believe that you will be starting school this week. On the one hand, it is so clear that you are ready and I know how great the Y is and how much you are going to love it. On the other hand you are my baby and sometimes you still seem so small to me and I can't believe that I am going to have to share you with anyone. I will really miss our unstructured mornings, cuddling in bed or just hanging out and you asking me, "Where am I going today?" (which used to be, "Where I going today?") or "Are you staying with me the whole time?" and then your big bright smile when I tell you that we are going to be spending time together. You are so verbal and have the best expressions and I just love our conversations and playing pretend and knowing where you learned most of what you know. School changes a lot of things. There will be many outside influences and your teachers will, no doubt, become very important to you. The past few days, I just keep feeling like everything we do is the last time we are doing this before you are a Sun Roomer. And we just finished the last weekend before school starts. It was a bit bittersweet though, like all things with you, mostly sweet. Last week, two of your teachers came over for a home visit. You were your very best self -- outgoing and enthusiastic and so adorable. You really had a great time working on your sun ray and showing them your room. But you are definitely feeling ambivalent about school because you know that I am not going to be there. I really didn't think you would have a hard time with separation. You've been pretty independent for so long. And I actually still think it isn't going to be too bad. But you have definitely told me that you don't want to go. Then in another moment you will proudly tell someone else that you are going to go to school. In fact, for quite awhile you have been happy to tell people that you are going to the "92nd Street Y" or "The Sun Room" but now that you are understanding more about what that means, I think you are not so sure about it. However, I am pretty confident that once you see your classroom and all the babies and art supplies and great toys to play with, you are going to be very enthusiastic. I am very excited for this next phase of your life and both Daddy and I are happy to be back at the Y, a school we love a lot. I am one of the class moms for your class and I'm looking forward to that. But mostly I think that your teachers and the other kids in your class are so so lucky that they are going to get to see you every day and I am going to miss you every second that you are gone. I love you. xx

To Stella, Seven Years Old

Dear Stella, Happy happy birthday. You continue to be growing up and becoming more and more interesting and dynamic and just dynamite. I have so much admiration for you -- for your strength and your smarts and your confidence. You are a really interesting, creative, strong, sensitive and just plain fabulous girl who I love spending time with. You have a crazy amount of enthusiasm, are up for any adventure and pretty much make doing anything way more fun than it would be without you. You also have a great sense of humor. This has been a pretty spectacular summer. I was thinking today about all the camps you have attended, starting with the one in Poughkeepsie at the JCC. You really didn't want to do that but I was working at Vassar and just felt you needed to be with other kids for part of the day. It wasn't too great and I think I remember than you didn't swim -- you just sat by the pool and watched. But you participated in everything else. Then the next summer you went to Pine Cobble in Williamstown. You also didn't want to do that camp but you ended up really loving it. Then the following year you went to Trinity Camp which was a great intro to the school you would be attending and where you had a pretty good time and loved your counselors. And then this summer you took a bus 40 minutes into New Jersey to go to Ramapo which you absolutely loved.

I was pretty worried about the long day (bus pick up at 8:15 and drop off at 4:45) but you did great. And you weren't even really that tired at night. You made some good friends, told me that the bus was the best part, learned lots of songs, became obsessed with lanyards and just generally grew up a lot. Then you did a week of ice skating at Chelsea Piers which you didn't love but you went everyday with no problems at all. You have really grown up and gotten quite independent. On the way to the Ramapo bus the first day, you were a little bit nervous. But you were excited too and I was so proud that you were able to move through your nervousness with such grace.

The weekend before, we met up with two girls who were on your bus and you ended up sitting with them almost every day. Even though it wasn't my idea (one of the other mothers initiated it), I felt like such a good, smart mom for having you be familiar with a few kids in advance.

And yet when I look at the picture of you getting on the bus, I am reminded that as soon as the bus pulled away, I turned around and burst into tears. Vivian was very confused and I tried to explain to her that you can be happy and sad about something at the same time. I was really mostly just so very proud of you. On the way to Chelsea Piers the first day you told me that you were a little bit nervous. I was happy that you felt comfortable to share that with me and also, again, so proud of how you didn't let your fear get in the way. You never do and it is an inspiration. You have become quite the fan of Tyler Swift's not very good but pretty catchy song, "You Belong To Me". I think Clara taught it to you in Nantucket and now you sing and perform it for me a lot. By osmosis and a bit of teaching from you, Vivian has also learned it. You also enjoy "Call Me Maybe", another not amazing but super catchy tune. And finally, you are super obsessed with the musical "Bring It On" which you have seen now at least five times. There are three songs on Spotify and you could just listen to them over and over. Even though your butt is decidedly NOT big, I love hearing you sing, "I got a big butt but so what? It's as good as any other." You are an adorable little performer with such huge personality. Speaking of which, this summer you and Clara put on a play and you played about six roles and were pretty incredible. One of your characters was a guy with a Bronx accent. I'm not totally sure how you mastered that but it was pretty great. As I am writing this, I'm thinking about how much you are coming into your own and how much I love watching it. It is such a tremendous privilege to watch you grow and to be your mom. You are a complicated kid who sometimes has these overwhelming outbursts that I think are triggered either by your frustrations at being not totally in control of everything that you can/can't do because you are still a kid or by your extremely competitive nature. But really you are getting better and better at managing your emotions and I love every single thing about the rich, complicated, highly intelligent, sensitive, deep thinking girl that you are.

You remain an older sister without parallel. I cannot begin to tell you the number of times people -- strangers and friends -- comment on what an amazing relationship you and Vivian have. You are so caring, so protective and proud of her. You are also a little bossy, sometimes a bit rough and occasionally mean (as is she). But it's all fun and funny and great to see. I am so happy for you both that you have each other. You still say plenty of cute things. Like the other day, Steven and Clara had to cancel their trip to Great Adventure because of the weather and you said, "I wish they were going to Fun World." But now you usually know what day of the week it is and whether or not Ranny is coming or what the plans are for the day. And so when you were adamant that we celebrate your birthday on your actual birthday (even though it was the day after we got home from Nantucket and a Monday), I knew that we had to actually do that because there was no more tricking you. Not that we were ever big into tricking you but maybe once in a while... You are super incredibly into gymnastics and you did about 100,000 headstands this summer. You and Vivian would do them against the wall, on the couch, on the orange chairs (much to Daddy's chagrin), on the sidewalk. Really anywhere possible. When we were at Dartmouth for my reunion, you would see a big field (or a small field) of grass and shout "GYM-NAS-TICS!!!!" and then run and do a cartwheel or a handstand or whatever. And that pretty much carried on through the summer. You can now finally do a kick over which was a super exciting development. You are also super incredibly into dogs and desperately want us to get one. Fortunately, we live in a building with several and you have become quite the little dog walker. You have gone several times with our across the hall neighbors and once with people who live upstairs. When you know that you are going to have an opportunity to walk a dog, we pretty much have ego build the whole day around that event and nothing better get in the way! Tomorrow you are going to be visiting your First Grade classroom for the first time. You are very excited about the girls who are in your class and definitely gearing up for a great year. I hope that it is everything that you want it to be and many many things that you cannot even imagine. I love you so much, Stella. Being your mom is really unbelievably great. Love, Mom